I tried a 2-D printer once, and the paper jammed.
So now I just painstakingly re-create my paper copies by hand, like a medieval monk.
i tried using paper, but the edges crumpled
so now i just chisel my commandments into stone, like old testament god
I tried using stone, but it cracked and broke.
Now I just scream everything at passersby, hoping they’ll remember what I said so I can ask them about it when I need it.
I tried shouting things at passersby but they ignored me.
Now I emit allohormones in a gypsobelum that bonds selectively with the recipient’s hemolymph to reconfigure their bursa copulax into a copulatory canal. I can only say one thing, “I want to mate with you,” but really, what else ever needs to be said?
*upper middle class fucker voice* But you have [one nice thing] so how are you poor
"Dude, you’re so edgy and politically incorrect. it’s totally ironic and satirical how you regurgitated those ancient and threadbare stereotypes. It reminds me of my great great great great grandpa, Cracker von Patriarch, who also challenged the status quo by embracing it with loving tenderness."
No sugardaddies. No sugar mamas. No sugarbabies. Full socialism in romantic relationships. There are only sugarcomrades.
#fucking snakes goddamn
A swiss diver, captured these pictures of one of the six anacondas he saw on his 10 day trip to Mato Grosso in Brazil. This one was about 26-feet long.
"At the first moment it’s scary because you don’t know the animal and everybody says it’s dangerous. ‘But after a while you understand that nothing happens if you respect the snake. ‘I have never been so close to a snake like this before. But I think a small poisonous snake is more scary than a big one. At least you can see the anacondas clearly and know what they’re doing." - Franco Banfi